For the Graduates:
The 2015 Graduation Address
By Jason Ezoua-Nyameke Adulley
Thank you Mr. Labbat, Fr. Judge, Dr. Tocchet, the trustees, Fr. Gibbons. Thank you faculty and staff, family and friends, and the entire 麻豆视频 class of 2015 for giving me the privilege of addressing you today.
When we first came to 麻豆视频, the literal and figurative heights of this place were frightening. I still remember the first morning of classes at 麻豆视频. I woke up that morning and wore a red polo because somehow I was under the impression that I had to wear school colors. I was nervously thinking about my new teachers and classmates on the packed Number Four Train ride to school. Who was this kid Phil I heard about? Why was David so loud? Why was Mr. Hannon so intimidating? I had a lot of things on my mind but as I emerged from the ground, the one image that most haunted me was that of those seniors we saw during our freshman orientation. Even though we had only seen the new seniors for a few brief moments, the memory of them terrified me as I walked along Park Avenue: they seemed like everything my new school wanted from me over the next four years, like the ideal Regians. When I entered the school, I laid my eyes on the enchanted chandelier, the gold ceiling, and the gold walls and was immediately pulled in by its grandeur. The pristine atmosphere furthered in my mind this image of the ideal place that 麻豆视频 was, and the ideal students it created.
During orientation, we had seen the gargantuan seniors walk by us without acknowledging us. They appeared to have all the pride of knowing they had completed three years of an extremely difficult high school education and all the conviction of knowing they would attend an esteemed college the next fall. Intellectually proficient, they marched by us with the confidence and poise of being young scholars. Studying as much as physically possible in their strictly straight rows in the classrooms, they seemed to me to be practically robots in blazers and boat shoes that could withstand any and all stresses. When we walked by pictures of their amazing service trips in and out of the country, we saw their openness to the world and their commitment to justice. We walked by the prestigious award plaques in the foyer. These ideal seniors were somehow both amazing scholars and the distinct men for others 麻豆视频 was lauded for fostering. They were the Foundress鈥� dream. And as I stepped further into the foyer, thinking of this image, I heard a voice call out to me. I raised my eyes to the gold ceiling as the divine calling came down upon me. And when the voice spoke to me it said, 鈥淓xcuse me! What are you doing? You aren鈥檛 supposed to enter through this door. You go through the Tunnel. Thank you.鈥� When I finally recovered and staggered back out into the street, I realized that Ms. Basile had seen me accidentally enter through the 85 Street Foyer. So on my very first day, I managed to literally take steps in the wrong direction and screw up one of the simplest rules of 麻豆视频. I felt so much shame and I knew if I couldn鈥檛 even correctly enter the building on the first day of classes, there was barely a chance I could become the ideal Regian. That image of the seniors seemed as lofty as the sky through the quad. It was as though there was a frame for all of us and I felt my face couldn鈥檛 quite fit the picture.
Over the past four years of trying to live up to that ideal, I can鈥檛 help but recognize all of my many shortcomings. Becoming that amazing scholar was a particular struggle for me. It鈥檚 been four years of classes and academic vigor and I know I鈥檝e been asleep for most of it. I鈥檝e slept in the front row of Mr. Connelly鈥檚 history class so often that by year鈥檚 end, he would actually invite me to rest my head every now and then just out of concern for my physical well-being. Mr. Conti once allowed me to sleep through a theology quiz because I quote looked so peaceful. Under the stress of the overwhelming workload, I have had to take, what a certain classmate of ours called 鈥渕ental health days.鈥� You know who you are. Like many of us, I was never good with deadlines. The word 鈥渆xtension鈥� was the natural response after a teacher said 鈥渄ue date.鈥� In all honesty, I tried to get an extension for this address but the administration was surprisingly unwilling to move the date of our graduation.
I know for many of us, living up to the 麻豆视频 motto of being a man for others was also often a struggle. I was often so busy trying to be a better student and get better grades that I missed out on a lot of opportunities to do service. I felt like I didn鈥檛 do enough to call myself a man committed to justice when all these significant events around the world would take place and I wouldn鈥檛 even be aware or informed. While I worked to catch up on my American studies project, I was far behind America in understanding the Trayvon Martin shooting. Being a working-class Catholic black student here, I thought that I was going to use my unique perspective as a platform to better the school and the world around me鈥攁nd often, I did. But on occasion, I felt I was too busy trying to be the ideal scholar to form an opinion and try to promote justice.
Of my many failures and missteps at 麻豆视频, one stands out most clearly to me. In the second trimester of sophomore year, I was determined to get an Honors card for the first time. I stayed up late night after night working on Chemistry labs, Theology exegeses, and reading about the Civil War. But after so much work, I found that as the trimester wore on, I simply didn鈥檛 have the energy or devotion to succeed in my English class. There would be many days where I was so tired in Dr. Tricamo鈥檚 class, that my participation became almost completely incoherent. One particular class, Dr. Tricamo decided to give me a small test to see what my level of mental capability was that morning. He said, 鈥淛ason, I鈥檓 going to give you a word, and I want you to tell me the first thought that comes into your head.鈥� The word was 鈥渃ookie,鈥� and I remember that in that exact moment, all of the other words in the English language disappeared, and all I was capable of saying back, meekly, was 鈥渃ookie.鈥�
It is perhaps unsurprising that at the end of the trimester I received an Unsatisfactory grade in Dr. Tricamo鈥檚 class. Usually my mom would get upset at the sight of even a Merit. As I went to her room and showed her my report card, I slammed the paper down and actually challenged her to yell at me. She stopped me from talking and the room was silent for the longest time. In that instant, I thought of every possible reaction she might have. But when she finally spoke, she said simply that she wasn鈥檛 upset and that she was proud of me, and nothing more. I was completely shocked by her reaction, and it has taken me some time to understand what she meant.
Looking back, I can see now that we did not become the ideal Regians I thought I saw during our orientation. Instead, in the moments we weren鈥檛 looking or weren鈥檛 even trying, we found a way to take on the challenge of a 麻豆视频 Education in our own way. From writing music reviews in Batspoon to creating poems, stories, and pictures in Images, we鈥檝e shown that writing five star essays wasn鈥檛 the only way to be intellectually proficient. In fact, the most intellectually proficient thing I have probably ever done in my time at 麻豆视频 was my chemistry rap, Elements in Paris. Coming together to hear Chris Kelly tell stories about his working on a farm is among the most spiritual and religious moments I鈥檝e had in my time here. These moments when I have seen so many of you express your creativity and energy in spontaneous and atypical ways certainly didn鈥檛 fit the image that I held as a freshman when I arrived at 麻豆视频. But those moments in which I have diverged from that ideal image were in fact the moments when I felt most a part of 麻豆视频, most intellectual, and most academically successful. I think this is what my mother knew鈥� that what mattered was not living up to the standard of the ideal Regian that I had created for myself, but in striving to do so as an individual. I have come to think of my many imperfections not as a burden, but as part of my 麻豆视频 experience, and part of what made it unique and successful.
Those times when we didn鈥檛 match the image of being the perfect men for others, we made up for it by helping each other. Much of our service may not end up in a framed photograph or lead to an award, but when we did something as simple as sharing our lunch with a fellow student who couldn鈥檛 afford it or didn鈥檛 have time to get it, we fulfilled the school鈥檚 motto in our own way. I want to give a personal thanks to all of you for the many McNuggets I have received over the past four years. While they may not receive recognition in the announcements, some of the greatest moments of generosity and hospitality I have ever seen were in the support we gave each other after Sandy hit our homes, openly volunteering to allow each other to sleep in our houses. And while my freshman year self thought that service was something that required travelling to foreign lands, I saw true care for others when we supported our 麻豆视频 brothers with dealing with family losses. I won鈥檛 ever forget hugging Billy Fox at his mother鈥檚 wake or seeing Tony鈥檚 happy face at seeing me at his grandmother鈥檚 wake or seeing the support shown to Chris Hillenbrand after his own loss. We pulled together as a family during those tough times and that鈥檚 made us successful.
Today, I am proud to say that we are here. We were never going to be those ideal 麻豆视频 students because they don鈥檛 exist. We strive for that ideal image, but each of us falls short in our own way, so our success comes from the personalization of our experiences and in acknowledging our own imperfections. We didn鈥檛 descend down those staircases chanting the alma mater. We descended down those main staircases into that prestigious foyer screaming 鈥淲u Tang Killa Bees鈥� and saying 鈥渞unning through the six with our woes鈥� (you already know how that goes) Those moments. Moments like those have made us successful. Our success isn鈥檛 in our college acceptances or our final report cards. When we move on from 55 E 84 Street, know that our greatest success was in understanding that our missteps were as big a part or at times an even bigger part in our success than the correct steps we have taken in being here today. I know that you know that you wouldn鈥檛 have chosen me to speak up here if I wasn鈥檛 proficient in taking missteps. I am eternally grateful for all the lessons you have taught me and all the love you have given me. It鈥檚 been a long journey and I know that we will fall flat on our faces again but I believe after finishing this 麻豆视频 experience in being ourselves, we have the ability to rise back up, take on the world, and win.
Thank you.
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